DETROIT LAKES, MINN. - I went to a "Constitution conference" in Detroit Lakes, and now I have a problem.

How do I skewer the hosting organization without offending the people who attended, some of whom I know personally and like?

The organization, Patriot Academy, definitely deserves skewering. The six-hour event in west-central Minnesota drew about 120 people, some of whom drove hours to be there. Many of us paid $50 to attend, some in Trump gear, some wearing gold crosses or stars-and-stripes sweatshirts.

For $250, you could also have dinner with Rick Green, formerly a Texas state legislator who now calls himself "America's Constitution Coach."

Yet the event, which was supposed to be about our Constitution, barely mentioned our founding document. Its purpose seemed to be a lengthy sales pitch for Patriot Academy, whose primary goal is to develop its coaching program.

"My hope is that when you all leave today, you leave as coaches," said Tristan Ghazal, coaching director.

If money is an objection, he said, you can become a host for free. Or for $97 a year, you get a subscription to Patriot U, "very similar to Netflix," which includes its curriculum and video content as well as a 20% discount on everything that Patriot Academy sells.

"I think it's a 20 percent discount, right?" Ghazal asked a fellow organizer. "Twenty-five! Way better than what I was promoting."

For $997, you get a giant box set, plus a 30% discount for all future materials.

Ghazal was friendly and glib, building quick rapport with his audience, sprinkling in jokes and faux insults.

Over the next 24 months, he told them, he wants to get 5 million people through the curriculum. They already have 30,000 coaches, 4,000 of them active. But they need more.

"This isn't partisan," he said. "This isn't a Democrat or a Republican thing. This is a — the law of the land should be known by the citizenry. And let's just follow that."

Yes! Yes! Amen. So, teach us about the Constitution, brother!

But the teaching was one-sided. He said the Constitution was written to restrain government, which it does, but he didn't mention that its primary purpose was to create a strong federal government with the power to tax and to regulate commerce, among other powers. It replaced the Articles of Confederation, which didn't even have a role for a chief executive. George Washington didn't become president until 1789, six years after the Revolutionary War ended.

We heard from a few Patriot Academy coaches, including Steve Boyd, who ran against U.S. Rep. Michelle Fischbach in the Republican primary in 2024. They didn't teach us about the Constitution, either. But they did tell us how great it felt to be part of Patriot Academy; it felt like a family, one said, everyone sharing the same faith and the same love of country.

They assured us that coaches don't even need to know anything about the Constitution. All they need to do is invite people to their home or church and watch Patriot Academy videos together. They talked about being led by God to become coaches. A sigh of pleasure went up from the crowd when one of them recounted singing "Amazing Grace" in the Texas state Capitol.

"You may be here, checking us out, going, OK, what is this Patriot Academy, I've heard it's a cult.'" Ghazal said. "Well, cult is short for culture, so guilty as charged."

It wasn't until afternoon that "America's Constitution Coach" arrived; organizers blamed flight problems for his lateness. Rick Green didn't seem like the head of an organization that claims a dozen members of Congress as graduates of its program. In a dark jacket and jeans, he could have been on his way to the hardware store.

In rapid-fire delivery, he urged the abolition of the U.S. Department of Education, the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, and every federal department that duplicates what states do. Nothing in the Constitution authorizes any of these departments, he claimed.

Green said parents alone should decide whether their children get vaccinated, implying that parents haven't always had that choice.

He recalled the resentment some Christians felt when society shut down during COVID.

"You're not going to tell me if I can sing at church," Green said.

He told his listeners to advocate for all local governmental offices to place "In God We Trust" signs in public places and to urge schools to hire Christian chaplains and use the Bible as a primary textbook. He wanted us to fight for the Ten Commandments to be placed in every school and courtroom.

Afterward, I asked him what he would think if school districts wanted to hire Muslim chaplains.

He said no. No Muslims. Only Christians.

To Rick Green and those like him, this is a Christian nation.

And my dear friends who attended this event or who agree with him, I love you. But he is wrong. We are not a Christian nation. We are a secular nation that protects our right to worship according to our conscience.

Destroy that, and you destroy America.