Here's how to make a whole state chuckle.
On national television, pronounce Mankato "Mahn-KAH-doe."
As floodwaters and debris threatened the Rapidan Dam near Mankato on Monday, a CNN broadcaster's best guess at pronouncing the state's south-central city left some Minnesotans in stitches.
"Not the man-caught-o," someone snorted on Instagram.
"Mankato like avocado?? Nah bruh. Man-Kay-Toe," someone else chipped in.
It was a welcome bit of levity while we waited to hear the fate of the dam on the Blue Earth River near "Man-Kay-Toe," as well as the fate of the nearby Rapidan Dam Store. (The home of the store's owners didn't fare as well as the store and dam are expected to.)
Although, perhaps we shouldn't come down too hard on CNN. According to the City of Mankato's website, the area was originally called Mahkato by its first inhabitants, the Dakota Indians, which may be closer to CNN's version.
"An early spelling error was never corrected and Mahkato became Mankato," the website explains.
Minnesota is full of names that weed out the locals from the out-of-towners. North of Alexandria is the town and lake named Carlos. If you pronounce it "Car-lohs," you ain't from around there. Locals know it as "Car-liss," which made for a moment of merriment when author Carlos Whittaker was introduced in an Alexandria school last winter.
When I was a teenager working at the Holiday Inn in St. Louis Park, a guest asked me directions to "WAY-zay-tah." He then scribbled it down, clearing away my confusion. W-a-y-z-a-t-a. "Why-ZET-uh," I corrected him.
When you're young, hearing a garbled pronunciation can help you understand that there's a whole world out there that has never heard of your school or city. And if you were there, in that foreign place, you might butcher their names just as badly.
If you try to get fancy and pronounce our place names in their original languages, you may misstep. My junior high French always gets me into trouble. Every time I drive by Alexandria's Lake L'Homme Dieu, in my head I pronounce it "Lohm Dyuh," "God man" in French. But I would be rightfully mocked if I spoke that aloud, because it is locally pronounced "La Hama Doo."
To add to the complexity, Minnesota place names do sometimes follow French rules, as, French-style, the "X" in St. Croix is silent. One place that trips me up is the Ojibwe tribal government in northern Minnesota. As "bois" is the French word for "woods," is Bois Forte pronounced "Bwah Forte" or is the "s" silent: "Boy Forte"? Neither. It's pronounced "Boys Fort."
Minnesota place names reflect the state's history of intermingling of native people and European newcomers. Names like Bemidji (sometimes pronounced "Brr-midji") came from the Ojibwe people, while New Ulm reflects German influence, and Malmo, in Aitkin County, was named after a city in Sweden.
We take our place names from explorers, fur traders and presidents, according to the 1920 book "Minnesota Geographic Names" by Warren Upham, a Minnesota Historical Society archaeologist.
The Dakota contributed the name Eyota, a city east of Rochester, which means superior or highest, according to the city's website. It's pronounced not "Eye-ota," but "Ee-ota."
You might tangle your tongue over Rothsay, but you don't actually have to pronounce the "th" sound. To locals, it's "Rot-say," and an important fact about the city is that it boasts the world's largest prairie chicken.
Also, the county that is home to the Brainerd lakes area does not want you to think it ate its cousins. Aitkin County is not pronounced "ate-kin," but "achin'," as in "achin' bacon."
And last but not least, Chokio is not "Choke-ee-o," but "Sh'kayo." Kinda like Ohio.
To bring it all back to Mankato, the latest word is that the dam will survive the onslaught of water brought on by recent torrential rains, and so will the people who live downstream. And tomayto, tomahto, that is what matters.